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Kevin Kelly, an editor who helped found the culture media magazine WIRED, turned 70 on April 28, 2022, and wrote a blog post about what he thinks he wished he had known when he was younger.
The Technium: 103 Bits of Advice I Wish I Had Known
https://kk.org/thetechnium/103-bits-of-advice-i-wish-i-had-known/
On his 68th birthday, Kelly published ' 68 pieces of advice for young people ,' and on his 69th birthday, he published ' 99 more pieces of advice ,' and this time the number of pieces has increased. There is no distinction between 'the higher the piece, the more important it is,' but the following pieces are listed in the order Kelly listed them, separated by five pieces.
There's about a 99% chance that now is the time.
No one is more impressed with your possessions than you are.
Never work for someone you don't want to be.
・Nurture 12 people who like you. It is more valuable to be liked by 12 people than to be liked by 12 million people.
- Try not to repeat the same mistakes, but make new ones.
If you listen to a musician or street performer for more than a minute, you owe them a dollar.
-What you say before the word 'but' doesn't count
When you forgive others, they may not realize it, but you will be healed. Forgiveness is not something you do for others, it is a gift you give to yourself.
- Courtesy costs nothing. Put the toilet seat down when you use it. Let people get off the elevator before you. Return your shopping cart to its proper place. When you borrow something, return it in a cleaner condition than when you borrowed it.
When you have a two-way argument, find a third party.
Efficiency is highly overrated and slacking is highly underrated. Regular rest, long vacations, aimless walks, and downtime are essential for peak performance of any kind. A great work ethic requires a great rest ethic.
When you're a leader, your real job is not to create more followers, but to create more leaders.
Criticize in private, praise in public
Life's lessons are presented to you in the order they are needed. You have everything you need to master that lesson inside of you. Just when you think you've truly learned a lesson, the next one is presented. The fact that you're alive means there are more lessons to learn.
It is the student's duty to find out everything from the teacher, and the teacher's duty to find out everything from the student.
If winning becomes too important, try changing the rules to make the game more fun. Sometimes changing the rules can even create a new game.
If you ask a funder for money, they will give you advice. If you ask for advice, they will give you money.
Productivity is often a distraction. Instead of striving for better ways to get a task done as quickly as possible, striving for better tasks that you never want to stop doing.
Pay your vendors, workers, and contractors promptly so they will choose you first the next time they need work.
The biggest lie we tell ourselves is, 'I remember it, so I don't need to write it down.'
Your growth as a rational person is revealed by your willingness to have uncomfortable conversations.
Speak confidently as if you were right and listen carefully as if you were wrong
-Fun fact: When you stretch your arms out at shoulder height, the distance between your fingers is your height
- Consistency is more important than quantity when it comes to effort (exercise, friendships, work). Nothing beats the little things you do every day, and they're much more important than the little things you do every once in a while.
Making art is not selfish. If you don't do what you should do, you are deceiving those around you.
Don't ask a woman if she's pregnant. If she is, let her tell you.
You need three things: the ability to persevere until it works, the ability to give up when it doesn't, and trust in others to help you distinguish between the two.
When speaking in public, use frequent pauses: a pause before you say something new, a pause after you say something you think is important, a pause to let the audience absorb the details, etc.
- There is no such thing as being on time. You can either be late or leave early. It's your choice.
Ask anyone you respect. Their good fortune came from a detour away from their main goal. So embrace the detours. Life isn't a straight line for anyone.
The best way to get a correct answer on the Internet is to post an obviously wrong answer and hope someone corrects it.
- Especially with children and animals, rewarding good behavior is 10 times more effective than punishing bad behavior.
Spend as much time crafting your email subject line as you do the body of the email. This is because most people only read the subject line.
Don't wait for the storm to pass, dance in the rain
When checking references for job candidates, former employers may be reluctant or even forbidden to say anything negative, so leave or send a message saying, 'If you highly recommend this job candidate, please reply.' If you don't get a response, take it as a negative.
Use a password manager. It's safer, easier and better.
Half the education you'll ever have is learning what to ignore
The advantage of having an incredibly ambitious goal is that you set the bar very high. Even if you fail, it may still be considered a success in the eyes of the average person.
A great way to understand yourself is to really reflect on all the things that irritate you about other people.
- In hotel rooms, don't put your luggage in drawers, but put all your luggage in a visible place and gather it in one place. That way, you won't forget anything. If you need to put a charger or something next to it, put two other large items next to it. It's less likely to forget three things than to forget one thing.
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It is rude to deny or brush off a compliment. Accept it with gratitude, even if you think it is undeserved.
・Be sure to read the plaque next to the monument.
When you achieve a certain level of success, you may feel like a fraud. Who am I fooling? But if you create something that only you can do, something that uses your unique talents and experience, you are definitely not a fraud. It is your destiny. It is your duty to do what only you can do.
What you do on a bad day is more important than what you do on a good day
Make something nice for people to have.
・If you open the paint even a little, it will get on your clothes no matter how careful you are. Dress appropriately.
The best way to keep young children well behaved on car trips is to put their favorite candies in a bag and throw one out the window every time they misbehave.
You can't get smart people to work hard just for money.
When we don't know how much to pay someone for a job, we ask, 'What would be fair?' and the answer is usually, 'Just the usual.'
90% of everything is junk. If you hate opera, romance novels, TikTok, country music, vegan food, and NFTs, keep trying and see if you can find the other 10% that isn't junk.
You will be judged by how well you treat people who do nothing for you.
We tend to overestimate what we can accomplish in a day and underestimate what we can achieve in a decade. In a decade, miracles can be accomplished. In the long run, small accomplishments overcome big failures.
Thank your teachers for changing your life.
You can't convince someone of something you don't agree with
Your best job was the one that wasn't suited to your growth.
Buy used books. The words written are as good as new ones. So are libraries.
You can be anything, so be the person who finishes the meeting early.
A wise man once said, 'Before you speak, pass your words through three gates. At the first gate, ask yourself, 'Is it true?' At the second gate, ask yourself, 'Is it necessary?' At the third gate, ask yourself, 'Is it a kind word?''
・Use the stairs
You end up paying twice as much for something as you planned for it - energy, time, setup costs, maintenance, repairs, disposal costs, etc.
When you arrive at your hotel room, check where the emergency exit is. It only takes a minute to find it.
The only productive way to answer the question 'What should I do now?' is to first address the question 'Who should I be?'
- Maintaining average returns for above average periods produces extraordinary results.
It's thrilling to respond very politely to rude strangers
A less intelligent person who communicates well is much more likely to perform well than a super-intelligent person who cannot communicate well, because it is much easier to improve communication skills than intelligence.
Being deceived every once in a while is a small price to pay for doing your best for everyone
Art can be anything that is permitted.
The best way to have the best relationship with your kids is to spend half the money and twice the time.
Buy a current tourist guidebook for your city or region. You can learn a lot by pretending to be a tourist once a year.
Don't queue for famous dishes. It's almost never worth the wait.
- To quickly determine the true character of someone you just met, you can make them use a really slow internet connection and observe them.
The way to become popular is to do something strange and make strange things a habit.
Back up your data. Have at least one physical backup and one cloud backup, and have multiple copies of each. If you lost all your data, photos, and notes, how much would it cost to restore it? A backup is cheap compared to regret.
Don't believe everything you believe.
To signal an emergency, use the rule of three: 3 yells, 3 honks, 3 whistles.
・Do you order what you think is delicious at a restaurant, or try something new? Do you make something you know will sell, or try something new? Do you continue to date new people, or do you bond with someone you've already met? The optimal balance between exploring new things and utilizing what you've already found is '1/3'. Spend 1/3 of your time exploring, and 2/3 of your time digging deeper. As you get older, it becomes more difficult to devote time to exploration, as it seems unproductive, but aim to devote time to exploration.
Great Opportunities do not have 'Great Opportunity' in the subject line
When you are introduced to someone, make eye contact and count to four. This helps you remember each other.
If you think, 'Where is a good knife?' or 'Where is a good pen?', you have a 'bad thing'. Throw it away.
When you're stuck, explain your problem to someone else. Structuring the problem often helps you see the solution. Make 'explaining the problem' part of your troubleshooting process.
When buying garden hoses, extension cords, and ladders, buy ones that are significantly longer than you think you will need so they are sized appropriately.
Don't fight the old, create the new.
Your group can achieve much more than they can afford just by showing that they are appreciated.
Whenever someone talks about the good times before things started going downhill, the peak of their life, it's always the year they were 10 years old. It's the same for every human being.
You are only as big as the object of your anger
When speaking to an audience, it's better to fix your gaze on a few people rather than 'scattering' your gaze around the room. Your eyes tell people whether you believe what you're saying or not.
Habits are much more reliable than inspiration. Build habits to make progress. Don't focus on getting in shape, focus on becoming an athletic person.
When negotiating, don't aim to make something bigger, aim to make something big
If you were to repeat what you did today 365 more times, would next year be the ideal you want it to be?
・You only see 2% of others, and they only see 2% of you. Pay attention to the hidden 98%.
Your time and space are limited. Remove, let go, or discard what doesn't bring you joy to make room for what does.
Our descendants will do things that will amaze us, but some of the things they will create could have been made by us with the materials and tools we have today, if only we had the imagination. Think bigger.
To get the most out of your efforts, be especially curious about things that don't interest you.
Focus on the direction, not the destination. If you stay on the right track, you'll get where you want to go.
Every breakthrough starts out laughably ridiculous. In fact, if it didn't start out laughing or ridiculous, it wouldn't be a breakthrough.
If you lend someone $20 and they avoid paying you back and you never see them again, it's worth $20
- Copying others is a good way to start; copying yourself is a sad way to end
The best time to negotiate salary for a new job is after the other person has told you they want you, not before. This will create a game of chicken, where each person has to name their own figure first, but whoever gets the other person to give you the number first has the advantage.
Instead of steering your life to avoid surprises, aim for them.
If you rent a car with a credit card, don't buy extra insurance.
If your opinion on one subject can be predicted from your opinion on another subject, you may be dominated by an ideology. If you really think for yourself, your conclusions will be unpredictable.
Aim to die penniless and give to your beneficiaries before you die. It's more fun and more useful that way. Spend it all. Send the last check to the funeral home.
The best prevention against aging is to continue to be surprised
